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Today was a hard day.

Today was a hard day for me. It started off better than most day have been lately, but then it got so bad. I was called into the office at work around 10 this morning and told they had to send me home pending an investigation. Someone complained to hr claiming I threw a girl (2 year old) into a wall, picked kids up by thier arm, used my foot to push kids and threw wood chips at a girl. None of this is true, but I just can't understand why anyone would say those things. Its so frustrating because I know who it is, how could I not. What I really can't grasp is I've been with this company for over a year and this person just started 2 weeks ago. So in an hour my work will close for the day, and I haven't heard anything from them. Like what is going on? I just can't handle this. All day has been spent running every day through my head thinking about my actions and if I actually did those things. Questioning myself. I have worked with children for the past 15 years, which I know doesn't really mean much considering the world we live in, but I mean come on. I hate this feeling of being scrutinized this way and not knowing whats going on. All day I've wanted to cry but haven't been able to. I talked to one of my co-workers who assured me there is nothing to worry about. And they say no news is good news right? I don't think this applies to this situation. I've been praying all day for reassurance and for God to take things into his hands, but my brain won't stop thinking about it. I need my brain to stop!

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October 2015
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